The Mystery of Women

OK, seriously. I feel I need to ask someone, *someone* who may be able to helpexplain something to me.I’ve noticed over the last few years that university-aged women (i.e., women intheir twenties) talk like stoners. Seriously. They speak in a low grumblingtone, like they are lethargic and were just woken up from their midday nap infront of the loud TV. Don’t get me wrong, I used to smoke enough pot that theexhaust would fill the Hindenburg many times over, but I have never *never*talked like a stoner (and for the record, I don’t smoke anymore because I findit too strong now and it just puts me to sleep). Anyway, I don’t mean tosingle-out the women but I honestly don’t see the same trend/pattern with theguys. I look to the trust-worthy observers at AAS and I’d love to hear thecomments. I conclude that I don’t have a problem with how people speak, but Ithink this speaking “trend” is just that and I’d love to learn more about itsorigins (not that I’m looking to adapt the trend anytime soon).ta

It?s time for a true story.? When I moved back to Toronto this year after living, working, and partying at my cottage for four months, I spoke in what you call the ?stoner? voice.? But I didn?t see it as being a ?just up from a nappy-poo the tv is too loud? voice, but as my? okay, I?m about to admit how LAME I was not even that long ago ?awesomely cool surfer voice/my justification for getting chubby over my lazy carefree days.? BUT ? the real moment of truth ? I WOULD ONLY SPEAK LIKE THIS AROUND THE MALE SPECIES.? And the same goes for my other lady friends in their early twenties.? We would speak in our active and animated voices with each other, but when we were around the dudes, this stoner voice would escape from our nervous, trembling bikini bodies.? This was so that we wouldn?t have to deal with the vulnerabilities of revealing our true selves to you.

Now that I?ve stopped the 4 month party and am not chubby anymore, my voice is excited, charming, and alive *alive*.? Chances are that many of your women friends are, in fact, stoned.? But, too, speaking in a ?low grumbling tone? is a lot of people?s way of covering up their real, natural voice while sorting out their own insecurities.? Getting high is a way to escape reality and relax, and the voice associated with it seems a good way to seem chilled and non-obsessive about everything.? Down to Earth without being the Girl Next Door.? Generally, it?s the voice we use that we think will impress YOU.? Or, at least in my experience it?s what it?s been used for.